How I get sh*t done with ADHD - Part 2
365 flighty ghoul
Recently, I published Part 1 of my “How I get sh*t done with ADHD” series. In it, I shared a bit about my ADHD backstory before giving some big-picture advice for functioning with ADHD. The responses from y’all were amazing, and I appreciated hearing from folks with similar struggles. If you haven’t read Part 1 yet, click the link above and check it out, then meet me back here.
In Part 2, I am focusing on more granular tips for how I handle specific ADHD-driven obstacles in my life. I’ve organized the tools and tactics beneath broader ADHD issues to provide structure, though some strategies help with more than one issue.
I also want to mention that I’ve included a handful of product recommendations, some of which contain affiliate links (denoted with an asterisk). If you purchase something through an affiliate link, I may get a small percentage of the sale. I use the [itty bitty amount of] money I earn from affiliate sales to help pay for recurring business expenses like software subscription fees and office supplies, and I never recommend anything I don’t use personally.
Alrighty then! Without further ado, here are things that help me conduct my symphony of brain squirrels into something resembling harmony at least some percentage of the time. Remember that not everyone with ADHD experiences the same symptoms with the same severity and we all have different strengths, so your mileage may vary.
Lack of energy
I have always loved naps and grew up convinced I was lazy because of my constant fatigue. It turns out that having ADHD and being tired all the time go hand in hand. Ways I deal with exhaustion include:
Having accessible, low-effort meals and snacks available for when I have limited time to cook and eat. One cause of fatigue for ADHDers can be forgetting to eat or not eating due to frustration/overwhelm (e.g., food texture issues, the time it takes to cook, analysis paralysis over choosing food). So I prioritize having easy options on hand, like cereal, frozen meals and pasta, frozen bread and bagels, gushers and fruit roll-ups (bought in bulk at Costco), and bagged salads. Sometimes that means sacrificing affordability and ideal nutrition, but I’m okay with that because “fed is best” isn’t just for babies. I also like to double recipes when I do have the energy to cook so that I can freeze leftovers for future me.
Allowing myself naps when I feel too tired to function. Unless I’m napping for an hour and a half or longer, I don’t usually fall asleep. But even just closing my eyes in a dark room to give my brain a break helps to reenergize me when I’m riding the struggle bus.
Sticking to a sleep routine as much as possible. I have chronic sleep issues. Either I can’t turn my brain off enough to fall asleep, or I wake up in the middle of the night, my brain turns on, and I can’t go back to sleep. I’ve tried a bajillion sleep hygiene recommendations, and the things that have actually made a difference are:
Going to sleep and waking up around the same time most days.
Limiting screen time before bed (I struggle with this one, but the earlier I stop using my phone/laptop before going to bed, the easier it is for me to wind down).
Using my Bearaby adult weighted blanket, especially in the colder months. Mine is 15 lbs, and I’ve had it since 2021.
Blocking out light with blackout curtains* and sound with a white noise machine.
Sensory sensitivity/overstimulation
People with ADHD tend to be more sensitive to outside stimuli than people without it. I’ve noticed that overstimulation makes me irritable at best and sends me into a full-blown meltdown at worst. Here’s how I cope with a world that often feels too loud, too bright, and too distracting:
Noise-canceling headphones. I have the Apple AirPods Pro 2, but there are plenty of non-Apple options available. I don’t know how I lived before being able to block out noise around me. I put in my AirPods when I’m running errands alone, if I’m at a coffee shop working and it’s too loud, when I’m listening to something while doing household chores, and to curtail airplane noise.
Noise-reducing reusable earplugs. Noise-canceling headphones are great, except when you need to interact with other people. For loud environments, like concerts, parties, and even some restaurants, I’m a fan of these Eargasm earplugs*. I use the “smaller ears” version, but they have larger sizes* too. They’re great for ADHD, and they also protect your hearing in general.
Avoiding crowded places during peak hours when possible. For example, I plan my grocery trips around when the store will be quietest (usually weekend evenings or weekday mornings) because I get frustrated when I can’t easily navigate a space. I used to do the same thing when I went to public gyms, though I’ve been much happier since I built out a home gym.
Adjustable lighting options throughout the house. I like the “Big Light” when I’m working during the day, but when evening arrives, we switch to lamps and dimmable overhead lighting. A bunch of our lamps are from Brightech, and we’ve found them to be good quality for the price. Most importantly, every lamp in our house is outfitted with a WiZ Smart Bulb*. You can change them to a bunch of different colors/scenes, dim them, and control them in the WiZ app or other smart home apps (we’re a Google Home family).
Prioritizing comfort and warmth. Most of my wardrobe is made up of soft and comfy fabrics that aren’t restrictive. I stopped wearing heels years ago. I only wear bras with underwire on rare occasions. I also get cold easily, so I keep a space heater* in my office and we have blankets all over the house (this ridiculously cozy blanket* is our favorite, and we have it in five different colors and sizes).
Transition resistance
When I learned that transitions SUCK for people with ADHD—it’s difficult for us to start things, stop things, switch between things, and go with the flow when plans change—it explained a lot of my daily habits and frustrations. I’m not going to pretend like I can’t still be found sitting in my towel and staring into the void after a shower or helplessly scrolling on my phone on the toilet, but there are things that mitigate the problem:
Asking my partner to ease me into action when I can’t do it myself. Jessie has ADHD too, but she doesn’t struggle as much with transitions, or at least not the same ones I do. I tend to get stuck in bed in the morning, stuck on the couch in the evening, and stuck on my phone before bed when I’d rather be reading. We’ve had enough conversations about it now that she knows how to look for the signs that I’m stuck and gently help me get moving.
Environmental cues like automations and alarms. Jessie has a bad habit of working past when she needs to (hello hyperfocus!), so we set up an automation that turns off her computer screen and the lights in her office at a certain time each day to cue her that it’s time to quit. I also suggested that she set an alarm for 15 minutes before that happens so the transition is less jarring.
Using an app blocker to keep me off of social media at certain times. Last year when I realized that scrolling in bed in the morning and at night was a big issue for me, I downloaded an app to block me from social media at certain times of day in an effort to curb my habits. Even with there being times I overrode the app, there was a noticeable reduction in my screen time. So I recommend you play with some app blocker options to find a good fit (I’ve used both Opal and Freedom).
General forgetfulness and misplacing things
In Part 1, I talked about how ADHDers struggle with memory and increased forgetfulness, which is why it’s important to write everything down. In addition to that advice, here are other ways I combat my awful memory:
Apple AirTags*. I bought a bunch of AirTags during a Black Friday sale a few years ago, and we’ve found many uses for them. Jessie and I each have an AirTag in a keychain on our keys, plus we have one hidden in the car. There’s one in my purse, and Jessie has a special wallet that holds an AirTag. We always have them in our checked baggage while traveling too. They are little lifesavers.
The free OneTab browser extension for tab overload hell. There’s a running joke amongst ADHD folks about keeping a million tabs open on your computer. That used to be me until I started using the OneTab extension to keep my tab groups labeled and organized. I’ve been using it for years, and as a result, I never lose my tabs and it’s very easy to come back to stuff (like when I’m researching a product, a vacation, etc.) without slowing my computer down to a crawl.
Giving every object a home. People are always impressed with my organization, but what they don’t realize is that it’s a strategic coping mechanism to keep my house from spiraling into chaos. I am very big into storage solutions (bins*, baskets*, door racks, drawer organizers, and the like) as well as labeling those things when appropriate (I love my label maker* an aggressive amount). When things don’t have a designated place, DOOM piles start to form. So I try to get ahead of that issue.
Struggling to focus
ADHD makes it difficult to focus on things that don’t interest you (or that aren’t as interesting as other things competing for your attention). It’s a constant, frustrating battle. For me, meds have proven to be one of the best weapons in my arsenal, but I also rely on:
Keeping my hands busy when I’m trying to process information. I love a good fidget toy (I have so many of these stretchy caterpillars*), and I’ve been known to doodle if I have paper and pen in front of me.
Keeping my brain busy when I need to do something with my hands. I love listening to audiobooks or music when I’m getting ready (showering, doing my wavy hair routine) or doing boring chores that take minimal brainpower. This tactic does not work when I need increased concentration. If I tried to listen to an audiobook while cooking, for instance, I would either miss steps in the recipe or lose track of what was happening in the story (ask me how I know).
Putting on instrumental background music to cue my brain that it’s time to get to work. I can’t handle music with lyrics when I’m doing deep work, but instrumental tracks help me get into the zone.
Relying on Do Not Disturb mode on my phone. I know my phone is my biggest distraction, yet it gives me anxiety to keep it in a separate room. Do Not Disturb mode is the happy medium for me because I’ve customized it so that notifications from Jessie still come through as do notifications from our doorbell and security cameras. That way I can weed out most of the unnecessary distractions without worrying about missing something important.
Body doubling. Body doubling is the practice of having company (virtual or in person) to complete tasks you’re dreading. Some people find that having another person present who is aware of what they’re trying to accomplish can help increase motivation and focus. I use this tactic often for errands (Jessie and I try to go together) and writing (I schedule writing dates with a friend to keep me moving forward on projects).
Regular exercise helps me get out excess energy so I can focus. Ugh, I know. Why must exercise be so helpful? Alas, I really have found that keeping to an exercise routine improves my energy levels, sleep, mood, and concentration, and research on ADHD and exercise backs that up. Elle Woods was on to something.
Like I said in Part 1, by no means do I have all of this figured out. Just because I have a toolbox of options doesn’t mean I’m perfectly consistent with using it, and there are plenty of ADHD symptoms that the toolbox can’t touch. I’m sure I will forever be saying “What?” multiple times in conversation as I struggle to process what has been said. I’ve yet to find a solution to my terrible spatial awareness, so I constantly hit my knees and elbows on things and fall up the stairs at least once a week. And I doubt my big, overwhelming feelings are going anywhere, though therapy has given me healthier ways to approach and process them.
On my best days, I recognize that even though my brain does not respond well to conventional wisdom, it came equipped with some special talents and abilities that make me who I am. I’ve learned to turn less of my frustration and anger about ADHD inward, and direct it outward instead at a world that was not built to accommodate neurodivergence.
I’m doing my damnedest to make the best out of less-than-ideal circumstances, and I bet you are too. Let that be enough. Because you are enough.
Queerly yours,
Shohreh
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